A month or so ago during the US Open, the network ran a Nike commercial message over and over.

The ad was narrated by Tiger Woods’ father, Earl. Aided by appropriate visuals (including actual clips of Tiger as a teen and pre-teenager), Earl related to the viewer how he would do everything short of firing a starter pistol as his young son attempted to concentrate on his golf shot(s). If you watched the Open, you’ll no doubt remember the ad, as it was extremely well produced and it certainly hit its target(s). If not, then you can hit the play button below to see what you missed.

All one can think of is that old German aphorism (many credit the Irish, but it truly IS German in its origin), “That which does not kill me only makes me stronger.”

Of course, this particular collection of antics is at the same time funny, sad, mean-spirited, and effective as hell.

I have a strong-willed, smart, handsome, and reasonably athletic son who, on August 8th (08-08-08) will be EIGHT. He lives in a house that I couldn’t even possibly imagine when I was his age, and he brings home grades that I never could have even sniffed at age 7, 10, 13, 15, 20, or EVER!

And, he probably right now is thinking that, “this is how it will forever be”. In fact, I KNOW it!

Sure, I tell him about living in apartments (21 in all before I even started sixth grade). These were apartments that could easily fit into what we now call our “Great Room” on the first level.  And, I tell him about me selling eggs door-to-door --- 144 dozen each and every Saturday morning --- to make 3 cents a carton for my school clothes.

You already know how this is received. Sure, he’s polite … but is he even LISTENING?

And, I tell him about my bankruptcy and my divorce and how I “flopped” wherever I could (including in the streets) for a long time, before I could even afford another rental space of my own. I also tell him how the government came and took my house, some of my furniture, and both of my cars.

But, as of this point in time, I have never “gone Tiger” on him. I just don’t know ...

Earlier tonight, I was at a swimming meet for the neighborhood kids. The kids swam, the winners won, and the losers lost (or perhaps as my five year old daughter would say, “We losed.”). So far as I could determine, not even one single soul really much cared about the result of the match. In fact, not one child from our side even asked to see a trophy.

So, the inevitable question: “Does this parent raise his children a la Earl Woods (and encourage rather than instill)? Or, does he do what my father did (which was to more or less torture me virtually every time he had a chance to do so)?

I had a relatively short “term of office” that I enjoyed living with him.  I was there for just about three years before re-joining my two brothers and my mother.  In that time, my dad never once gave me a hug or even an “Atta-boy”. I lettered in football as a sophomore and his reaction (by phone) was, “Doesn’t everybody?” (Hell, I can still tell you where I was standing when he said that to me.)

At the age of 27, when I sold my first company for $3 million dollars, his response was, “Let me know when you make some real money.”

Now of course, I was both mad as hell and driven as hell to do something that would get his attention … but unfortunately, by the time I did this, he had already passed on.

So, I have my own personal experiment of sorts going on here, in that my two brothers --- the same two guys who lived their formative years under my mother’s guidance simply do not have the same drive and ambition to “prove themselves” as I did and still do (I’m certain that they would agree with me on this).

Was this the “Dad Factor”? Or, was it the inevitable result of what I call the “Dad Tortures Son” parenting method?

Of course, my wife and I will never really know this.

But what we DO know is that somewhere along the way, Tiger Woods picked up one HELLUVA competitive nature and drive. I’m sure that he would agree that his extremely competitive drive came from at least some of Old Earl’s “tricks and antics”.

In my opinion, and the Experiment notwithstanding, deprivation and persistence can and will build strong character in any individual; and in my opinion, strong character is the single most important element in the make-up of a successful person.

But please come to praise Earl Woods, and not bury him. Because he did what had to be done. Let’s now quote Johnny Cash, from his song, A Boy Named Sue (Watch the original video here):

 Perhaps you had a parent (or two) like Earl Woods. And if you did, then I suggest that you call them right now … so that they can know before they cash in their chips that what they did to you was also what they did for you.

They will be forever grateful for knowing this and for the knowledge that they did the right thing. (Yes, that door does “swing both ways”!)